Fear, panic, anxiety, nervousness ... everything is changing me in recent days. I know I've embarked on a path which I follow no matter what happens, but I'm finding more obstacles that I thought.
This afternoon, after a panic attack, the music played on your computer (Spotyfy) and suddenly has come "Today might be a great day" of the great Serrat and I thought that this was the song I used to encourage me and I have drawn a half smile on his face. It was clear that today, there would be a great day for me but what about tomorrow? Can it be? Maybe, maybe not. There's the you doubt. At the moment I have left is to go to sleep and tomorrow is another day ... but I'm afraid to sleep because the nightmares attack me mercilessly and I wake up almost every hour to watch the clock to see how much you need to get up, but then I have trouble getting up a lot because I'm tired.
Now I'm thinking in Ruby and register because I have a medical cocoa: if it falls to Barcelona to take the test, which if it goes to sleep if it falls to the revision of the sprain. For this part I see it, but the point is that, register in Ruby, I can not continue visiting the same psychiatrist but has to be one or the new registration and the issue is that it is one more change that gives me a little scared. IT professionals here is good, because they lead to Raul and they do very well, but it is a matter of change, cost me the changes so that we will fool! In July a year ago that we live in a small apartment so perhaps it is true that it is high time for me to register. It may seem like a bullshit but I worried a bit. To see the psychiatrist told me: a few months ago told me to wait and see how I adapted to the floor, the people, etc. Those months of "alert" are over. Then we started with the reduction of medication and of course I can not even change poses professional. Good, and I have almost decided, I registered, but first I will consult with Dr.
Tomorrow I go to my second visit to the psychoanalyst and I'm back nerviosilla not so much as the first day but a little bit, because it is not where you're going to shoot, I told him so much! But well, I guess it will go well. What I hope is that I can help relieve this anxiety that haunts me all the damn day.
On Thursday there is theater, that well! Although I have the fatal strain do not know if I should go. Or I go and sit-stay, at least I'll be there. It seems I have mono theater after two weeks without it, but my foot hurts so much and so hard to support me on the floor do not know how I'm going to ride.
Well, that's the roll for today ... sorry this speech without much coherence. I needed to get to do something and I chose to write. Perhaps it should not publish it, perhaps yes, but as I am going to tell my story does not come from here, no?
A hug, health and strength!
Almudena.
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